Okay, a charaidean… gone are the days of regular blogs, because my life is pure chaos at the moment. But be content you’re getting a little update from me - albeit, a messy bullet pointy blog.
As mentioned in my previous posts, my Film Directing course is intense (which explains the lack of updates). This is mostly because we have to make a film a week. I’ll say that again… a film a week! Every Wednesday, I die a little when we get our new prompt. From that moment, we have to conceptualise, write a script, and build a shooting schedule. Then comes the mad scramble: sourcing actors, locking down a crew, shooting, editing, colour grading, and sound mixing - all so we can screen our final cut in front of Bob Giraldi by the following Wednesday afternoon.
Eat. Sleep. Repeat.
It’s a lot but…. there’s something truly magical about having a finished film (albeit not perfect) every Wednesday. Nothing makes you feel more like a filmmaker than actually making films, so I’m thriving off the chaos (she says convincingly).
If you want to see my latest films, they’re available to watch here:
A few learnings as a Director over the past month:
You’ve got to look after yourself. I was getting dangerously close to burnout in my first three weeks (if you couldn’t tell from my last post). As a director, your primary job on set is to project calm and confidence - even when you don’t feel it. You simply can’t do that on zero sleep and no food, so I’m making a point to prioritise that alongside my films.
Lower the stakes. I used to approach every single film like my life depended on it and to be honest, right now, sometimes it feels like it does (school is my entire life). But in taking everything so seriously you drain the joy out of it. I’m learning to chill.
Don’t be too hard on yourself. I’ve always been self-critical, which isn’t inherently bad - I like being good at what I do. On a side note: I think self-criticism is bred into women which offers an interesting dilemma as a female director. Because filmmaking ain’t a solo sport. When you become a director, you have to leave the lone-wolf mentality behind because you’re part of a team. I’ve realised that when I criticise the final film, I’m not just critiquing my own work - I’m critiquing everyone who poured themselves into it. Being kinder to my team and the final film is forcing me to be kinder to myself which is an interesting learning curve.
Asking people to work for free. I’ve had to get surprisingly good at asking for favours. I don’t have a budget for these short film assignments, so I have to trust that people want to collaborate purely for the love of the craft. It means people can occasionally be flaky or non-committal, but overall my experience has been incredible. People truly want to give you their time, and they love being part of a creative story.
In other news:
I forgot to mention that I enrolled in a Continuing Education class. This is an additional evening class that explores the basics of music production. I mostly enrolled in it because sound is so important in filmmaking and I wanted more insight into sound design/production. “Why the hell is she taking another class when she’s clearly drowning!?” I hear you ask. Fair point. But I signed up with the mindset of: "If this gets too intense, I’ll just quit."
However, during our very first class we were greeted by a lovely Basque teacher with a cheerful "Kaixo!" and he immediately had us sound-mixing. Perhaps it was his enthusiasm, or our shared love of minoritised languages, but for better or worse I've stuck with it. I’m absolutely loving the course (although…I am putting in minimal effort for my own sanity).
I’ve also been exploring local music sessions. The Iona Bar is easily my favourite spot. It’s very hard to find a proper Scottish pub in NYC (because every pub is Irish), but I found it, and their Monday night sessions are great (they play a lot of the Scottish tunes that I know). I also checked out Putnam’s Bar in Brooklyn, though they were playing ‘old-timey’ music, which was... an experience.
On the cultural front, I went to the Irish Arts Centre to see Specky Clark. It was a bizarre, but powerful play, and made me fall in love with acting all over again. I also caught Wicked on Broadway, which was spectacular - despite the man next to me having a digital translator loudly narrate the entire show in Spanish directly into his ear.
On a massive high note: I got positive feedback on the first draft of my thesis film! I was worried my Gaelic/Irish roots had taken a back seat over the past few weeks (though I’m probably just being hard on myself), but they are front and centre of my thesis film. So much so that legendary director Bob Giraldi emailed me in Gaelic after reading my first-draft. If you can teach an 87-year-old New Yorker a few Gaelic phrases, anything is possible.
A few quick highlights:
Halloween in New York: Absolute madness and so much fun. 10/10. Finally had a weekend of pure fun.
Upstate New York Pumpkin Patch: Equally wholesome and lovely.
BAFTA Event: Attended an incredible BAFTA gathering and met Gurinder Chadha and Sebastian Stan.
Official status: Got my Social Security Number - I can now legally work in the states.
Oh, and... I made three more films.
General Epiphanies:
New York is the city of destiny. I promise I’m not just being overly romantic here. Too many “right place, right time” moments have happened to me in this city for it to be a coincidence - from meeting Gurinder Chadha (one of my favourite directors) at the BAFTA event, to friends unexpectedly flying through the city by pure chance. There are simply too many serendipitous moments proving I’m right where I’m meant to be.
The feeling of running out of time. I’m starting to accept that I’m always going to feel like time is slipping away. I’m still working on how to navigate that anxiety, but hey ho... time keeps a moving no matter what.
Directing is almost impossible to teach. You can easily teach technical filmmaking and production mechanics, but the actual craft of directing? That’s far more elusive. Yet Bob Giraldi has designed a course that attempts to do exactly that. He doesn’t have us acting as 1st ADs, runners, or sound technicians - he throws us straight into managing our own crews, directing real actors, and fighting to tell authentic stories every single week. Creating an environment that pushes you into the director’s chair is quite hard, but I feel I’m learning quickly so something’s working.
I’m over the AI doom and gloom. I feel like people are prematurely surrendering humanity’s creative spirit. Everyone seems convinced that human creativity will die with the rise of generative AI, but since when did we become passive bystanders? Do we really think AI art is that good on its own? Even the impressive stuff relies on human input and artistic direction. (And while environmental concerns surrounding AI are valid and worth taking seriously, I’m talking about cultural defeatism). Guys, we’re still here! Human storytelling isn’t going anywhere.
American positivity is contagious. Look, I know America has its faults. Believe me, I see it every single day in New York, where extreme wealth and total poverty line the same street. But there’s also something so deeply infectious - bordering on delusional at times - about the collective optimism here, and the unwavering idea that you can achieve anything you set your mind to. Maybe the “American Dream” is a myth, but that doesn’t stop people from believing in it. And honestly? There is something incredibly powerful about that kind of belief.
The future isn’t an English one. This is still a seedling of a thought, but I have a growing sense - both within the film community and in the world at large - that the future will not be dominated by the English language. Maybe it’s because my directing class is so wildly multicultural; we have about ten different languages spoken in one room, from Mandarin, Spanish, and Italian, to Irish and Hindi.
With the rise of large language models and aggressive globalisation, I think people are going to crave the hyper-local, the specific, and the deeply cultural. At the very heart of that shift are languages - multiple perspectives that can break open the polarising, binary world we’ve built. These are languages that resist being flattened by AI models, carrying centuries of lived cultural experience within their grammar and phrasing. I don't know where this thought leads to yet... but I just feel in my gut that the future won't be an English-dominant one, and honestly… I ain’t mad at that.
Onwards and upwards my friends xx Our next prompt in class is Emotions in the City, so keep and eye out for that!
P.S. Still have yet to see Mamdani, despite desperately searching for him at the NYC marathon on Sunday. He was there - I just didn’t see him!